Where I'll Be
by But I Have Promises To Keep
Summary: Where will Mal be when his partner needs him the most? One shot.


Natara Williams

I was told I cried upon waking. Not sobbing, but simply lying still as silent tears streamed down my face. I don't remember it, but I wouldn't be surprised if it were true. Upon reflection of that day I can barely make any recollections of any of the events that took place, but I've been told many times what happened. My first memories are foggy, as if I had watched them through a long tunnel. They were of lying in a hospital bed, listening to music. Not just music, but what sounded like many people singing. That is what I assumed was the reason for my tears. All I could think of was sitting in a muggy-hot car with Mal the last summer, waiting for something I can't remember anymore. A song had come on the radio, and I had stated that I liked it.  
>"You like-" he had taken a moment to look at the screen below to see what it was "-<em>Daughtry<em>?" he had gave a slight teasing smile "Isn't that country music?".  
>"I never said I like <em>Daughtry<em>, I just said I liked this song" I had retorted, blushing slightly. That was what I heard, the familiar lyrics that wafted from my window. I was told later they were having a candle-light vigil, and that was the first time I thought about how badly I must have been hurt.

_In the middle of September we'd still play out in the rain_  
><em>Nothing to lose but everything to gain<em>  
><em>Reflecting now on how things could've been<em>  
><em>It was worth it in the end<em>

This is what I heard upon waking. This is why I presumed I cried, since I had only ever told one person that I liked that song. That is how I knew that Mal was there. I saw him later, and he had explained to me what had happened. That I had been shot just below my shoulders in the back, that I was lucky to be alive. He was there when I was told I would never walk again. I was told I took it well, when really I didn't. I think when I was told I was in pure shock and didn't react at first, only later having it truly sink in as I cried into my pillow that night, away from prying eyes. They said later I should be happy. If I had been shot a few inches higher I would have died. But the down side was if I had been shot a few inches lower I wouldn't have suffered spinal chord damage. That I wouldn't be paralyzed from the weight down. I'm not sure if it was determination, a stubbornness towards accepting fate or plain stupidity, but I tried to walk many times. I only managed to push up with my arms, and I fell from my hospital bed. Mal walked in on me like that, picked me up and told me thing would be alright. I told him I wasn't so sure things would ever be alright again. That was the beginning my refusal to give up. I told him I couldn't accept the fact that I couldn't walk again. He told me he didn't expect I would. That was the beginning. He would hold my shoulder, supporting all my weight as I tried to move my legs. They said I couldn't, and I think it was partly out of spite that I did. After weeks of that he would hold my arm, supporting about half my weight, and we would walk together through the halls.  
>"Look at her" I heard one woman remark one day "Her gaits wrong, she walks funny". I ignored this cynical remark, only offering the woman a scowl as I passed. I became self-conscious about this later, and even told Mal this once. He said the way I walked showed I was strong, that I was a surviver. He later told me he thought it was fine. That there was nothing wrong with the way I walked now. I think he thought anything I did was good, that he was only glad I was alive. Later I could walk alone, but I still never did. Except that one time, but I knew I wouldn't be for long. That it was only a mere hundred yards until I reached him again. I knew every eye was on me that day, but I only had eyes for the one person I was walking towards. I nearly cried on that day too. They played that song again, it was our song now. We danced to it that day, shortly after my first kiss as a married woman. Nothing was ever the same after that, it wasn't a bad thing nor a good thing. I still walked with a limp, and left the FBI because of it. I still worked with Mal, but at a distance. I helped in interrogation, looked over files and crime scenes. He was no longer my partner though, and before we were married I used to get slightly jealous when I saw the young blonde woman who had replaced me. I never admitted this, but I think that Mal knew at times. Everyone said we were a miracle couple, I'm not so sure I think it was a miracle that happened. I think maybe part of it was, but a large part was the fact that I didn't give up, and that Mal didn't give up on me. That when I heard those voices outside, I knew Mal was waiting for me to walk out there to him.<p>

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><p><strong>Disclaimer, neither CoD nor the song is mine.<strong>


End file.
